Monday Manners: On Being A Lady

I found this list, a little old-fashioned, but still applicable, and thought y’all would enjoy reading it.  It is by Varina Jefferson Davis and adapted by Martha Clippinger, from  It lists recommendations on how we should be ladies, Southern or not.  Enjoy!

A lady is simply someone who cares about herself and others.  She sees that her garments are clean and neatly pressed, her shoes are polished, and every button is in place.  She is neat and tidy even at the breakfast table and wishes to appear well to her own family.  She keeps her hair clean and well-groomed and never puts her hand to her hair to re-arrange it or search for loose pins while others can see.
A lady does not monopolize the conversation.  She does not talk of herself and her own affairs but listens with well-simulated interest to a story that bores her.  This is the mark of good breeding.  She does not sit apart with one or two friends but makes the gentle effort to assure a good time for all with pleasant conversation.  A lady does not say or do anything that will upset those around her or make them uncomfortable.

A lady does not let any man kiss her or put his arm around her unless she is engaged to be married to him, and even then she should be a little stingy with her favors.
A lady, when she brushes off her hat, does not forget to brush away the cobwebs…in her brain.  She does not conclude that every man who has said something pleasant to her has fallen in love with her.

A lady is possessed of refinement, which prevents her from all fidgeting, from playing with her handkerchief, her umbrella, her purse, or whatever may be in her hands.  When she sits down she remains quietly, her hands resting easily without movement and her whole figure is filled with repose.  She is calm, composed, self-controlled at all times, yet there are no airs about her.  These qualities are what keep her from talking and laughing loudly, and they prevent her from hurting the feelings of anyone. 

A lady does not grow weary in well-doing but encourages herself by trying to live up to her ideal of a woman.  

Do you fit the bill?

Who knew there was a fern called the Southern Lady fern?

Photo Credits: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7
We had a wonderful time visiting the girls’ great-grandmothers this past weekend.  They were thrilled to hug and kiss W and E the entire time.   Pictures to come later this week.
If you haven’t entered my giveaway, make sure to do so before Thursday!  And good luck to all of those who have entered so far!  πŸ™‚

22 thoughts on “Monday Manners: On Being A Lady

  1. I am afraid I need a little work in this area. I guess we are just a little different up here in the North. We are more the "say what's on our mind" kind of ladies.

    I'm afraid I'm not always clean and groomed. Some days are too crazy to primp. Going to go take a shower now. LOL.

    Great post. Great reminder. I will work harder, I promise.

  2. Sounds like my everyday life… um, ok maybe some slight adjustments.

  3. Wow, there were some good reminders in here. This was great! I WISH I were more of a lady like this (esp. the perfectly groomed by breakfast one – I always feel a little sorry for my husband that he has to see me in the morning looking so rough and keep that picture w/ him all day while he's working!). Thanks for posting- I'll be working on my lady-likeness today πŸ™‚ – At least I do own some "Southern Lady Ferns"! Does that count for something??!

  4. There are few on this list that need a little tweaking! Even though it was old fashioned, it was a nice reminder πŸ™‚ I can't wait to see pictures from the weekend! Grannies and babies just make my heart melt!

  5. While today's definition of a "lady" may be a little (okay… a lot!) different, I think manners and acting like a lady are still very important! Fun post!

  6. I may flunk some of these tests, but I can keep trying, right? Great post. I ironed my shirt today, so I am good on that point.

    πŸ™‚ Marcie

  7. This is such a great post, I love hearing about these things. I'd consider myself a "work in progress" on this subject. Glad you had a great weekend.


  8. Wow.. the rules about men are a little crazy but some of the other ones STILL apply- actually LISTENING to someone when they talk is a dying art! Now it's always text text text on their cell phones… grrr.

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