If you’re used to reading my blog daily, you’ve probably noticed that I haven’t posted these past few days. I apologize for that. My heart and time just haven’t been in it. My cousin, 37, was killed in a horrible car wreck here earlier this week. The other driver was coming around a curve at full speed and didn’t turn, just kept driving straight and hit my cousin directly on his driver’s side. The rest of his car was completely fine. Even his guitars in the back seat were completely untouched. The other driver’s car caught fire and she had to be rescued by officers that arrived at the scene.
A little bit about my cousin. He had just moved back to Sullivan’s after living the last ten years in the Bronx. Everything seemed to be going right for him when this happened. Those who knew him said he was such a great friend with a passion for music. He made you feel comfortable right away and had this vivaciousness, yet coolness about him. In my eyes, he’ll always be remembered as one of the most positive people, and a very talented musician. When we were little, he taught me a piano piece he’d made up, and I can still play it to this day. We just got a piano yesterday, and naturally it was the first song I played on it.
In his last year in this world, he was closer to Christ than he’d ever been. After the wreck, his father was able to take his bible from the car. Just a constant reminder that we all need the Word. His Word. Even now, when it just doesn’t make sense. But for as much as we can’t understand, we know he’s in heaven now. At peace.
“God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.”
Please pray for our family. There are 24 of us cousins on one side, and he was the oldest. Pray for strength that my sisters and I can hold it together when we sing at the service today. Pray for his father who will speak at the service. And ultimately, pray for peace for our entire family. It’s hard to think about it now, but the Lord has a plan for each of us, and He needed him now. We just didn’t want him to leave us so soon.
Life is short and so very fragile. It sucks that incidents like this have to happen for us to be reminded of that. Squeeze those that you love. Tell them you love them. Often. You can never say it too much. So many questions run through your head when tragedies like this happen. But in the end, you can’t bring them back. And you have to learn to accept it.
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding”
To be extremely honest, today’s going to suck. Like I mentioned, there are a lot of us…cousins, uncles and aunts, sisters, parents, friends. We all live primarily in South Carolina, but still don’t get to see each other altogether that often anymore. It’s just sad that when we finally get to all be together, it’s for something like this. There will be tears. I’ve tried to stay pretty upbeat with the kids this week, not trying to think about it. It comes and goes for me. It’s hard to not think about it all the time. Like how easily that kind of accident could happen to any of us, and why it happened to him.
Wake up each morning with a grateful heart, for you never know when it may be your last.
After I told the girls, Effie asked if the mailman goes to heaven. When I asked her why? “Because I want to write a letter to him and tell him we’ll miss him.” And Wheeler wondered why we’re so sad because he’s going to be in heaven now, and don’t we all want to go there one day? Yes, one day…but not today…and not too soon…and not unexpectedly. But like I said, it’s not our timing, our path was paved well before we were brought into this world. It’s just our purpose to follow Him and the path He created for each one of us. I pray that I will always be able to instill that in my children. My cousin loved many, but one in particular was my grandmother. We’ve always credited her with giving all of us (her grandchildren) our musical talents and abilities. One thing that does make me happy is picturing them in heaven together, smiling and singing.
Thank you for your prayers!
**All photos from today’s post were taken by my cousin.**